The hook is never in the headline

Everybody reads the top third of a profile. Which is exactly why nothing in the top third builds any rapport.

The thing that makes someone stop and reply is almost always three-quarters of the way down the page.

The role from 2004 that has nothing to do with what they do now. The organisation they have quietly volunteered with for eleven years. The certification that does not fit the rest of the picture. The language they speak.

Say you are messaging a woman who runs an online skincare brand. You could open with her shop. Everyone opens with her shop.

Or you could open with the nine years she spent as a nurse before she started it, which sits there in her experience section and is almost certainly why her whole brand is built around what she will not put in a product.

One of those messages gets read. The other one gets archived with the rest.

This takes an extra four minutes. It is the four minutes.

And here is the part that matters if you are on the receiving end of a lot of pitches: the same rule tells you who to trust. When someone references the bottom half of your profile, they have spent real time on you. When they quote your headline back at you, they have spent none.

Where do you keep the most interesting thing about you, and has anyone ever mentioned it?

Torkild Smith

Helping women-led businesses adopt AI on their own terms — strategically, and without the burnout — is the whole reason I do this work. If that’s where you are right now, get in touch.